Darwin award

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cubfan64
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Re: Darwin award

Post by cubfan64 »

A friend of mine (Mel) could have ended up as a Darwin statistic when he was younger. He was in grade school and couldn't use a gun, but his brother took him duck hunting one afternoon. They got out to where they were going to hunt in the marsh when they realized they had left most of the ammo. back in the car. Mel got sent back to the car to get the ammo. and on his way back, he got sidetracked a little and as he came over a rise, he saw a whole bunch of ducks swimming just a little ways ahead. He dropped down and made his way around the rise and to his brother where he told him about the ducks.

So the plan was for his brother to get into position on one edge of the rise and Mel was then supposed to go at an angle up over the rise and scare the ducks up and towards his brother who could then get a clear shot.

Well his brother got into position and Mel snuck back up the rise through the wet and mud, occassionaly peeking to see if the ducks had spotted him. He got to within a short distance of them by sneaking on his hands and knees slowly and as he lept to his feet waving his arms and yelling "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH," another hunter less than 5 feet away jumped to his feet and aimed his gun briefly at Mel.

It turns out the ducks Mel saw were all decoys this other guy had placed out in the marsh to attract the real ducks.

Mel said he and the guy never said a word to one another, but the guy just looked at him with a frown on his face shaking his head and lowering his gun. Mel just turned around and high tailed it back to his brother.

Although it could have been tragic, the end result is a hell of a funny story for both Mel and the hunter to tell every duck season. Mel figures one of these days he's gonna be in a bar and overhear a fellow telling the story of how some moron kid almost got himself shot trying to scare the guys decoys and he can introduce himself :)
Sandman
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Re: Darwin award

Post by Sandman »

........I found myself in a van on a beer run into "town". The town I speak of is Springfield, Oregon and it's about 40 miles from sleepy little Blue River. I remember wondering why we didn't just stop at bar back there and buy some beer to go but hey, I wasn't the driver. I was just along for the ride having a couple of bucks to contribute to the cause. When we pulled up to the 7/11, my new found friend's thirsty expectations vastly exceeded our funds. A discussion of sorts was taking place and out of the darkness in the back, one guy uncovered a rifle. It was one of those old 8mm Mauser WW II surplus
guns and these guys were discussing the best way to get a quantity of beer and some gas money to get home on.

"Are you guys drunk or are you just plain crazy?" I exclaimed. (After all, my 2 bucks were in the kitty for the beer)

"Hey, if you dont like it, there's the door" said the guy with the rifle.

It was around 10:00 at night and it was raining hard (like it usually does on the west slope of the Cascades). As these guys were discussing "the plan", I made a split second decision. "See you guys later, I'm outta here" and I eased on out the door. Once into the shadows, I ran like a bat out of hell across the parking lot of a grocery store that had closed for the night. Seeking shelter from the rain (and a place to hide quick) I dove into a Salvation Army collection box and buried myself amongst the bags of clothes in the darkness. My heart was pounding in my chest and I soon heard the sound of speeding tires hissing on rainswept streets, followed soon by the sirens.

I buried myself a little deeper as I could see the reflections of the strobes reflecting on the wet surface of the parking lot I could hear the sound of the police radios. "247-three sixteen #@$##" "Driver, come out with your hands up" (or something like that) I then realized the dang fools never made it outta the 7/11 parking lot. And here I was, 200 yards away! My mind was racing, my heart pounding and by gawd, I really had to pee! (must have been all of that beer I'd been drinking) My mind came up with "my story", just in case I was discovered in the Salvation Army box. I was just going to play dumb and "pretend"
to be a bum. It wouldn't be hard to convince the cops of that!

after a while, things grew quiet and I must have passed out. I awoke with an old toaster jabbing me in the ribs and by gawd, I still had to pee. Gathering up my courage, I peeked out the door. All was quiet and the 7/11 was closed. It was starting to get on towards dawn and I was thinking about a cup of hot coffee when I realized, "Dang, them fools got busted with my 2 dollars!"

Dang, it's a 40 mile hitch hike back up to Blue River, I look like hell and feel even worse but hey, I had narrowly escaped going to prison and then I realized life wasn't so bad after all. So, out to the curb by the light I went and stuck my thumb into the breeze. About 20 minutes later, I see a familiar truck coming up highway 126 and a Blue River local that I had met before pulls over and gives me a ride.

"Did you hear about the robbery last night?"

" No. Really? What happened?" I replied..................My friend worked at the mill in Springfield and was just getting off the graveyard shift. It sure felt good to put some miles between me and that 7/11.

The next day my friend Larry showed me an article from the local Lane County newspaper. The article listed the full names of my drinking buddies on that fatefull night including the middle ones and the article went on to say....The POLICE were still searching for one unidentified suspect who had escaped. I guess someone saw me running away or something like that. It was about then that I decided the climate was much too wet around Blue River, Oregon and maybe a change in climate would do me good! And so, with my thumb in the breeze once again, I headed south into the desert
Dan
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Re: Darwin award

Post by Dan »

Sandman wrote:........I found myself in a van on a beer run into "town". The town I speak of is Springfield, Oregon and it's about 40 miles from sleepy little Blue River. I remember wondering why we didn't just stop at bar back there and buy some beer to go but hey, I wasn't the driver. I was just along for the ride having a couple of bucks to contribute to the cause. When we pulled up to the 7/11, my new found friend's thirsty expectations vastly exceeded our funds. A discussion of sorts was taking place and out of the darkness in the back, one guy uncovered a rifle. It was one of those old 8mm Mauser WW II surplus
guns and these guys were discussing the best way to get a quantity of beer and some gas money to get home on.

"Are you guys drunk or are you just plain crazy?" I exclaimed. (After all, my 2 bucks were in the kitty for the beer)

"Hey, if you dont like it, there's the door" said the guy with the rifle.

It was around 10:00 at night and it was raining hard (like it usually does on the west slope of the Cascades). As these guys were discussing "the plan", I made a split second decision. "See you guys later, I'm outta here" and I eased on out the door. Once into the shadows, I ran like a bat out of hell across the parking lot of a grocery store that had closed for the night. Seeking shelter from the rain (and a place to hide quick) I dove into a Salvation Army collection box and buried myself amongst the bags of clothes in the darkness. My heart was pounding in my chest and I soon heard the sound of speeding tires hissing on rainswept streets, followed soon by the sirens.

I buried myself a little deeper as I could see the reflections of the strobes reflecting on the wet surface of the parking lot I could hear the sound of the police radios. "247-three sixteen #@$##" "Driver, come out with your hands up" (or something like that) I then realized the dang fools never made it outta the 7/11 parking lot. And here I was, 200 yards away! My mind was racing, my heart pounding and by gawd, I really had to pee! (must have been all of that beer I'd been drinking) My mind came up with "my story", just in case I was discovered in the Salvation Army box. I was just going to play dumb and "pretend"
to be a bum. It wouldn't be hard to convince the cops of that!

after a while, things grew quiet and I must have passed out. I awoke with an old toaster jabbing me in the ribs and by gawd, I still had to pee. Gathering up my courage, I peeked out the door. All was quiet and the 7/11 was closed. It was starting to get on towards dawn and I was thinking about a cup of hot coffee when I realized, "Dang, them fools got busted with my 2 dollars!"

Dang, it's a 40 mile hitch hike back up to Blue River, I look like hell and feel even worse but hey, I had narrowly escaped going to prison and then I realized life wasn't so bad after all. So, out to the curb by the light I went and stuck my thumb into the breeze. About 20 minutes later, I see a familiar truck coming up highway 126 and a Blue River local that I had met before pulls over and gives me a ride.

"Did you hear about the robbery last night?"

" No. Really? What happened?" I replied..................My friend worked at the mill in Springfield and was just getting off the graveyard shift. It sure felt good to put some miles between me and that 7/11.

The next day my friend Larry showed me an article from the local Lane County newspaper. The article listed the full names of my drinking buddies on that fatefull night including the middle ones and the article went on to say....The POLICE were still searching for one unidentified suspect who had escaped. I guess someone saw me running away or something like that. It was about then that I decided the climate was much too wet around Blue River, Oregon and maybe a change in climate would do me good! And so, with my thumb in the breeze once again, I headed south into the desert

I'd say, for utter stupidity, that certainly beats anything I ever did. I didn't hang around with felons. That explains a lot.
Sandman
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Re: Darwin award

Post by Sandman »

Yep, those idiots were pretty stupid alright. A night sleeping in a Salvation Army box sure beat 5 years in the Oregon State Prison!
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Stanley
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Re: Darwin award

Post by Stanley »

Nice vids sandman, I was commenting on your post. As Dan said, stupidity in your tale. BTW I never hung with scofflaws either.
Sandman
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Re: Darwin award

Post by Sandman »

Didn't really know em, I was catchin a ride to town. Haven't you ever found yourself in a situation going bad Stanley? What would you have done? I lit outta that van like the devil was chasin me. I did a lot of hitch hiking around the country back in the early 70s and that was the scarriest situation I ran into. Mostly, I met good people. Those guys did their time for the crime. Fortunatly, I was able to get out the door BEFORE the robbery took place. Like I said, I wanted no part of it. Youre right, it explains alot.
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reptilist
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Re: Darwin award

Post by reptilist »

Sandman,
I used to hitchhike a lot back in the 70's too.... Had more than a couple scary moments and have also nearly been associated with bad hombres... Like you, I found a way to get away before being involved.
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TradClimber
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Re: Darwin award

Post by TradClimber »

Well done - Rep!

TradClimber
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